still...

right where i stopped ytdy...i slept early last night...i guess i'm really exhausted...i thought i'll be alright this morning...a new day begins..but somehow,i wasnt...still emo,still sad...woke up at 9.30am and brought my maid to have breakfast together...i told her everything...i'm really sad...just cant get over it yet...she said,if he mind,he would have dump u earlier...after tat,i'm heading to college...

as usual...chit chats...bie did msg and asked whether i'm alright...i am,but i'm just still sad...i didnt wana ruin his mood for today as it's a big day for his brada...i fetched hl home after our class...and i told her everything in the car...she asked me not to worry as andrew wasnt tat kind...if he is,what can u do? she asked...i kept quiet...i told her i'm afraid...sigh...distance was a short one...before i could finish everything,we reached her house already...i'm not going home after tat...

i'm home bout 6pm...i'm still complaining to my maid while i was having watermelons as my dinner...i asked her to have a walk with me...baby choc came along too...baby was hyper...cuz he just loves going out...capture a few pics...

online when i'm home and had a chat with ck...told him everything...and he said,"just ignore them lar...you're ANDREW'S gf...not theirs..." and he even said that if he really loves me,he wouldnt care but i knew bie did mind a lil or i shall use the word dislike when ppl say it..bcuz it is sth he cant chge,tat's wat bie told me...ck told me not to tell him tat i'm going for plastic surgery...i said i will...just a matter of time...he even scolded me,"wth wana go suck your lipids"...cuz i did say i wana do liposuction...sigh...

i thought of some one...louis...he did msg me and ask where am i earlier today when i was having class...he told me he didnt work cuz he's sick...then i called him up after the conversation i had with ck...i ask him to read my blog...but he's lazy...so ended up,i told him everything...i cried on the phone too...he just convince me and asked me not to cry...i just cant help it...it hurt alots,this i told him...he said,"you're MUCH MORE slimmer compared to last time...and you have a pretty face too...it's nothing you cant chge...just keep it up" this he tried to support me by emphasizing the word..i said,"but andrew didnt know how i looked or how fat i am before"...i even told him tat his frens said the same thing before,just tat i acted i dont know...he giggled...and said,"how do you know..." i said i can feel it...he just kept saying,they didnt...i just kept crying over the phone...tears wouldnt stop...but somehow,he tried to make me smile by making silly noises...i did...but it was just a lil while and i continue crying...sigh...we hang up after that...

i even stopped reading the book called "Nobody's perfect"...becuz i realized,ppl just cant accept the fact of it...and they live in the world of their own,seeing perfect body gurls and presentable looks...what's the point of continue reading it when the reality isnt like this? i was half way thru but just...i couldnt continue...i wana be prefect~!!!

i knew,i must overcome this by myself...but i still cant for now...i bet he's having a good time now...being a drunkard...i didnt wana ruin his mood...so i guess,i'll find someone to yam cha later...wanted to look for jl,but he had a gf...it doesnt look right...i guess i'll look for other person to lend me a shoulder...sigh...

while i was driving on the way back home today,i realize how brightly the sun shone..it's as though the sun smiled for me...but at the same time,there's hazes...hazes in my life,that makes my way blur...i couldnt see the future anymore...my dreams are crashing slowly like cracks on the mirror...

she's crying silently now...she hopes her dreams will come thru just like how she wanted it to be...with person whom she wants...she had him in her dreams of future...but will it? how is she gonna work it out,she asked...she promised herself not to cry over spilt milk and that her future will be better and she'll work it out to make sure it does...but only till today,she asked herself back,how is she gonna work it out? she knew she would hang on till the end of everything...even all these challenges,it gets harder at each level and it doesnt care whether u completed the before's...she still will overcome it toughly...no matter how much of it,how long it takes,how tough it is...she still will...

Signed ::♥ Forever Yours♥ ::